Welcome to a Healthy Core

Living life healthily from the inside out in every realm of life. 
 

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Number 3 out of 4 thoughts on a healthy spiritual heart

In the last blog we talked about the second of four thoughts on how to have a healthy spiritual heart. I've blogged a lot on having a healthy physical and emotional heart, but having a healthy spiritual heart is just as important. I write from my faith and my own paradigm.

King Solomon of Israel, one of the wisest men to walk the earth, said in the Book of Proverbs, 
"Above all else, guard your heart, for it is a well spring of life" or in another version says, "for out of it spring the issues of life". So if the most important thing to one of the wisest men ever is to guard your heart, then it's time to listen. Thankfully he then proceeds to write four lines of instruction. 


"Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you.
Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm.
Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil." 

Let's look at the third one: "Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm."

3. Navigate Life's Journey Well.

One way we can guard our heart is to avoid making foolish decisions that will lead to miserable outcomes. Living a life full of drama and stress is a great recipe for an unguarded heart full of anxiety, sorrow, unforgiveness and hurt. You can protect your heart by avoiding foolish reckless decisions that lead you to unsteady roads full of crooked paths and sinking quicksand. 


Here are a few thoughts on navigating life's journey well:
  
A. Chart the Course: When you are traveling along on the journey of life, take a moment and reflect on where you are heading. You may have never taken the time to really decide the direction your life is going. The reality is many a person has capsized, shipwrecked or been lost at sea because they lost sight of where they were headed or really never took the time to chart the course or check the weather conditions. 


Steven Covey, the author of 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, talks a lot about "begin with the end in mind". He goes on to ask what do you want read at your funeral? How many lives do you want affected by your life? Do you want people mourning for you because of the amazing impact you made on their life and the world or perhaps instead someone dancing in a red dress on your grave. The choice is really yours and it starts today. 


People work their whole lives for a paycheck and then what? They look back on a life of hard work, even raising a family but what contribution did it make to the world and what did it matter in scope of eternity. It's at this point they wonder what their purpose was and still is. 


Everyone has a purpose and it's up to you to figure it out, of course I suggest you pursue the discovery with prayer. There are tell tale signs of a person's purpose. Finding out what you love to do, what makes you angry and what you are really good at are three ways in helping you determine your purpose. For example, I love to help people, I get angry when someone takes advantage of a vulnerable people and I am good at influencing others and anything creative. So this tells me that I can use my creativity, like writing, to help people who are in need and influence others to do the same. Someone once said "if you can do for a living what you love to do then you'll never work a day in your life."


Figuring out your purpose will help you know where you're going and if you know now where you are going then you will begin now to make decisions that lead you to your destination. You might need to change degrees, reach to do an internship or relocate to follow your dreams. Whatever it is, the dream in your heart will steer you towards your destination. 


B. Use Wisdom as Your Compass: The main thing that you need to guide you is your compass. Your compass will keep you out of unmarked waters. Your compass (or GPS) for life's journey is Wisdom. Let Wisdom be your compass. 


There are two major schools in life that will teach you everything you need to know. The first is the school of wisdom and the second is the school of 'hard knocks'. I have attended both and have to say that gleaning from the school of wisdom is a much better way than learning through hard knocks or poor choices. Proverbs 19:18 says, "He who gets wisdom loves his own soul; he who cherishes understanding prospers."  


The school of wisdom is advice from people further along the journey. It would be foolish to ignore the advice of people who have already sailed in the same waters. Learn from others whose lives resemble the destination you want. If you want wisdom on how to keep a healthy marriage then talk to people who've been married for a long time. If you want to be a Supreme Court Justice then study the career paths of those who've become Justices. It's a no brainer. Find the people who have success in areas you want to pursue and learn from them.  

Here are some very wise people that I look to regularly for wisdom:
Finances = Dave Ramsey 
Leadership =John Maxwell 
Emotional and Spiritual Health= Joyce Meyer 
Physical Health= Jordan Rubin,
Time Management= Steve Covey 
Leadership & Creativity= Michael Hyatt 

I know so many people who just want to be happy, married, rich, or famous but the reality is learning wisdom is the key to having prosperity in your life. Wisdom is so easily accessible. The Book of Proverbs in the bible is full of wisdom, the writers listed above have written tons of books on this subject, and there are pastors and leadership gurus who talk on personal growth and development all over the web and bookstores. Use wisdom as your compass and you will reach your destination.


C. develop healthy relationships with your crew mates: You may have chosen some of your crew mates already or they have been chosen for you but from this point forward take responsibility for your choice in future relationships and set the tone on the one's you have now. When you are sailing it is important that you partner with others who are up for the journey. They don't have to be skilled sailors but none the less they should be willing to learn and able to go the distance. Steven Covey once said "Our greatest joy and our greatest pain comes in our relationships with others." Let's learn to steward relationships well. 


The biggest thing that can devastate a relationship is unrealistic expectation. If we are constantly expecting a person in our lives to do something or behave a certain way and they are not then we will ultimately be disappointed. The best way to avoid this disappointment is developing excellent communication skills. Doing this can improve the condition of relationships and help to foster an open and safe atmosphere where intimacy can be bred. Stop building walls and start building bridges through communication.
Here's a couple ways to do that:

1. Begin to embrace honesty in communication. I'm not saying throw tactfulness or politeness out the window but strive for integrity in what you communicate and be sure to tell people what you want. No one is really a mind reader so stop expecting them to do what you want without telling them what you want.



2. Set Boundaries. You have to communicate what you are comfortable with and what you are not. Some things are not ok and it's good to express that. Also honor others boundaries. 


3. Eliminate manipulation and control from your language. Eliminate trying to control others to get your way. When you do, you'll discover you don't always know what's the best thing after all. When you try to control or manipulate others you will make them miserable and eventually lose out in the end. Also, don't allow yourself to be manipulated. I have found that if someone is trying to manipulate me, I will just call them out on it. "Are you trying to guilt me?" Sometimes people don't even know they are doing it. It's good to let them know you aren't controlled by manipulation. 


4. Forgive. Quit keeping score. Communicate forgiveness and receive forgiveness and you will see a freedom and health in your relationships that will bring about great joy. 


Go into relationships with the thought to give and not take. Be considerate, thoughtful, kind and most importantly express your love to people. I love this quote by Steven Levine, "If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting?"
Navigate Life's Journeys well because you want to arrive at your desired destination with all your crew in tow. 








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